the sun still shines during the storm

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today was a dreary, depressing, stormy day

and i think i'm coming down with a cold.

but through it all

the sun still shines.

here's some rainy day music for you to enjoy:

 

the beauty of music.

Lately, in a few of my classes, we have been talking about the importance of

music.

More specifically,

music education. 

Who should learn music? Why should we teach music? What impact does music have on education?

Obviously, being that I'm a music education major,

I feel pretty strongly  on the subject.

But today, 

I saw the importance of music education

in a very different light.

And  I'd be lying if I said it wasn't going to take me a few kleenex to get through this post.

You see, for the past three years,

I have been teaching violin lessons to an elderly woman. 

Every week for the past three years,

she has faithfully shown up extra early for her lesson,

with a lunch packed specifically for me.

She practices harder and longer than  most of the students at my university

and truly has a passion for the violin.

Today, we met up for the first time since Summer break.

I greeted her and asked her if she'd like to schedule our lesson time for this semester.

She replied that she would like to keep her Tuesday time we have previously used

but

was unsure  if she'd be able to make it every week;

a strange statement for an elderly woman who braved rain, snow, sleet and hail to make it to her lessons.

She then went on to explain

that she was diagnosed with

cancer

this past week.

Three times a week  she will be receiving radiation treatments.

She has to cut down tremendously on her daily activities and her sister offered to have her move in with her for the next three months while she receives treatments to make life easier.

But she said no.

Why?

Because if she moved in with her sister, she would be unable to continue with her group and private violin lessons.

You see, ever since she was a little girl, she has dreamed of playing the violin.

And through our university's string project,

 she was able to live that dream.

Over 50 years later, 

she is finally living her dream.

And I feel so blessed to be able to journey with her to that dream.

She then went on to explain in further detail, 

how she must keep playing.

Because every week,

she goes to a nursing home

and plays her violin for the  elderly residents of the home.

And she believes whole heartily

that it brings them healing.

and joy.

and companionship.

Feelings that they haven't felt in years. 

She finished the conversation saying that she also whole heartily believes

playing  will bring her healing and peace

as she walks through the valley of the shadow of death,

and battles cancer.

And I have no doubt that it will.

I have no doubt about the power of music,

the importance of music education,

the importance of music education not only in our schools

but for all who yearn to discover its 

healing powers

and magnificent beauty.

On My Heart

Tonight I thought I'd share what's on my heart regarding a part of my life that has yet to be shared on this little blog. It brings me much

joy. 

frustration. 

struggle. 

happiness.

It is estimated that each day, the average American hears 5 hours of it. 

Music. 

You see, 3 years ago I made a decision that changed my life. After one semester of college, I switched from a Social Work major to a Music Education major. Up until that point, music had always just been a hobby. A hobby I did not take very seriously. 

or had much confidence in.

When I switched, a teacher of mine told me this:

There will be good days and bad days. Days when everything just clicks. Days when you find yourself in a practice room in tears...push through those days, because it'll all be worth it in the end.

This past semester seemed like just one big, bad day.  I spent more hours in tutoring than I did in actual class.  I found myself in tears of frustration and anger after  every lesson but one.

And every single day, I asked myself why I was putting myself through all this.

I hated music.

I think there comes a time in all areas of the arts, where we all reach a similar point. 

We feel as if we just don't measure up to par.

Whether it be by our own measure , a teachers, our peers , etc.

We feel as if we've given our all, but  little has come out of our efforts.

I ended this semester never wanting to play violin again.

And so I took a break. 

A nice long,

intentional break.

Until tonight.

For some reason, it just felt right to start again tonight. I played what I wanted to play, for as long as  I wanted to play.

And I loved every second of it.

With my recital approaching faster than I would like, I was sent home this summer with a list of music  from my violin professor to learn for my recital.

Not one of the pieces on the list did I suggest or have any desire to play.

So I'm not going to.

I'm going to play the pieces that I've learned over the past three years that have brought me joy.

They may not show off the skills I have or have not learned.

They may all be cliche and over played.

But I love playing them.

And some day, I hope the one thing that makes this struggle all worth it,

is seeing my own students

making music

that brings them

that same exact

joy.