a casual conversation

  











the other day,

i was sitting up in our music center 

talking to some friends

while i was waiting for one of my violin students to arrive.

the percussion teacher, Conrad, 

came and sat down  with us and asked about the  posters i had put up for homecoming.

He asked me:

"why do you want to be homecoming queen?"

my first response: "i don't know"

but then i thought more about it,

and began to explain

how i came to mansfield,

having spent high school not involved in much of anything

but wanting to turn over a new leaf,

and get involved. 

so i did. 

i joined hall council, activities council, mountie guides, residence life, etc.

and running for homecoming was the last thing i wanted to do

before i left and ventured forwards in life.

he replied:

"wow, it seems like you really found yourself here." 

his response took me a back a little.

and made me  think.

and think

and think.

and you know what?

he's right.

i spent much of my senior year of high school,

resisting the idea of college.

i applied to all of TWO schools,

the only two schools I could find that didn't have essays on their applications.

i was that unmotivated and against the idea of going to college.

upon acceptance,

i reluctantly  came up to mansfield for orientation.

declared a major just for the sake of declaring a major,

and started my freshman year.

from the first day,

i absolutely loved it (well, everything except my major) and

through a  series of  meaningful events,

i changed my major to music education.

since that change,

i've had days that have been very rewarding

and days

and days

of struggle.

i've failed  a few classes,

spent countless hours in tutoring,

been completely unmotivated to practice,

missed home,

had my heart broken,

been convinced i'd never get above a 40% on a dictation test,

lost friends,

reconnected with friends and

learned  the importance of knowing when to lead and when to follow.

but

it was all this struggle

and finally being out on my own

that helped me 

to find myself.

as people ,

we are constantly

growing,

moving,

changing,

learning,

but  i am so thankful for the past couple years

and i can't wait to see what is next on the journey

we call life.